Musings of a Work-at-home Mom: The Desitin Incident

I really think the term, “work-at-home mom” could be seen as an oxymoron.  I mean, working while taking care of kids is much like driving and texting… or walking a tight rope…or eating an ice cream cone in the hot Lahaina sun..Dangerous!

But, I live to tell about it…

I was sitting at my desk this morning.  My desk is in our family room. Hell, everything is in our family room, it’s one big room with our tv and couch at one end, then dining room table, then my desk.  So the kids are in eye sight, most of the time.  In ears reach ALL of the time (which can make teleconference calls a real bitch, let me tell you!) and so I believe I can do work and take care of the kids, albeit with the TV on (aka mommy’s helper) but I feel most of the time I can tame the work-at-home-mommy beast.

Most of the time.

So as I said I was sitting at my desk.  I take a mental note that my daughter is quiet.  Perhaps she fell asleep on the couch, afterall she was up ALL night last night and her show, Little Bear, which plays on the TV is, well, not a “active” show, it’s actually really mellow (mommy like!).  So I think “ooh, she’s sleeping, so cute! yay!” I am tapping away at my keyboard, setting up webinars, emailing folks, when I get a whiff.

A very distinct smell enters my nose.  Cod Liver Oil. I know that smell. Most moms know that smell.  It is the smell of the all mighty Desitin.  And no not the new (wimpy) Desitin formula that’s creamy and seems to do nothing for my daughter’s derriere.  No this is the old fashion, what-your-mama-told-you-to-buy, Desitin, with COD LIVER OIL and all. Did I mention COD LIVER OIL? Just being sure…

Anyhow, I know that smell. All too well.  It’s the $6 tube I ran out to buy at 10 p.m. the other night when my daughter had a howling, yahooo of a rash. Yeah, it was bad.

But wait, that smell wasn’t coming from my hands, I hadn’t just changed a diaper so it wasn’t looming in our room from a past poop wiping and it wasn’t coming from the tube that was on my desk next to me, in safe keeping.

Wait.

Where is the tube of Desitin that I purposefully put on my desk, away from the bambino, so that she wouldn’t attack it as she does anything that’s creamy and resembles paint?

Shit.

I head over to the couch.  I am sorta of creeping but doing it briskly.  I wanted to catch just what is going on. The couch back is to me, and it is the perfect height to hide my mischievous little girl on the other side. I am scared. I am thinking the couch is going to be covered in this yummy fish smell, water repelling WHITE thick Desitin.

I come around the corner of the couch and her head is down.  The couch is not white (oh thank god!). But then she looks up at me. And I see her.

Yes, it seems while I was working, my little girl had gone off and joined the circus and is now known as “Desitin Clown.”  In fact that may be her nick name for the rest of her life (fun times ahead in high school, little girl…just wait…)

She has covered her face. Her ears. The hair along her hairline. Her mouth has remnants of this pasty goo on her tongue. Poison Control anyone?

And what do I do? I whisk her off the couch…and then I do what any mother does when her child has made the biggest mess and is torn between yelling in horror and laughing so hard that you pee your pants…

I take a picture.  Well actually I took like 5, just to be sure I caught it on film so that she can always be reminded about “the Desitin incident” and so that I can email it to every person in my address book, oh and blog about it. But of course!

So here she is, my little Desitin Clown.

She was proud! Amazed at my composure. And she was taken over by this fishy, water repelling tube of Desitin.  Photos done, I plopped her into the tub.

Now, any one that has dealt with the real deal, old fashioned Desitin knows that it’s a WATER BARRIER.  Let’s look at that again…Water. Barrier. Um yeah. So how the hell do you get it off of your child’s face, out of her ears and out of her hair???

Well, turns out, some genius invented baby wipes.  And guess what they do the trick!  Not on hair but they did take off most and left her only looking like she was partially suffering from early gray-ness around her hairline.

I cleaned her up, she played in the bath and a nap was had by my little Desitin Clown.

I am not quite sure just how long the smell will last, I think it’s permanently in my nostrils.  And even after a shower for me, I am now looking at a streak of the pearly, WATER REPELLING, cream that is still on my arm from when she grabbed at me and fought me to keep the wonderful COD OIL infused cream on her face.

Yes, that is a moment, not a day, just a mere moment of what life can be like if you too want to work from home while taking care of your kids…stay tuned I am sure (and scared to know) that more good times like this are ahead.

**note, in the ever so wonderful time of “full disclosure” and “being transparent”, Desitin did not pay me to write this or my daughter to empty a whole tube across her face, and no I did not use a free coupon when I purchase this cream at 10 p.m. the other night to handle the ultimate diaper rash. But the stuff works.  It will not let water penetrate…I learned that all to well today**

Comments

  1. The awesome part of diaper cream is that it really sticks, gets on everything, and is hard to remove from anything. Even booties. Nice work kid!

  2. I remember this post! I’m glad you chose this one for the list! This one is classic!
    .-= Courtney Velasquez (@theappleofmyeye)´s last blog ..Barbie and the Three Musketeers =-.

  3. Hilarious!!! For my son, it’s markers. Thank God I thought to give him his own set of washables so he has no reason to sneak and play with my permanents.
    .-= erica mueller´s last blog ..Income Blogging Guide Contest =-.

  4. Lol. I can’t imagine yourself while looking at the white face of your daughter. She looks cute by the way.
    .-= Patrice´s last blog ..Moms Work at Home with Online Marketing =-.

  5. Leah’s on the same page with her cousin. Winston equates Desitin (aka “butt cream” in our house) with “sunscreen”. Heck, both white, yeah? If we’re putting on Desitin, he wants it on his face. If we’re applying sunscreen he wants some on his butt. I know that Leah’s Desitin clown incident is bound to happen here sometime. I fear I am on borrowed time.
    Love you Leah!! Cutie pie.

  6. And men say we have it easy!

  7. ROFLMHO! Too Cute For Words & I Laughed Til I Almost Peed Myself!
    .-= Rachel´s last blog ..FREE Back To School Printables =-.

  8. hahahahahah Better then my boy who eats anything “creamy” hahaha
    .-= Lisa Perez´s last blog ..Pediped NEW Fall/ Winter Collection Review =-.

  9. Too cute! And I mean that literally… even with the Desitin on her face she is still beautiful! :-) Kids really do and say the funniest things!
    .-= Donna´s last blog ..I’m not a Peeping Tom… Really! =-.

  10. Too funny! I have to ask…where did you get her shirt?

  11. I didnt know they made Desitin with Cod Liver Oil? I do have a picture of Loch with Desitin face, though. Yuck!
    .-= erin´s last blog ..Manic Mittens: Boutique Hair Bows & Accessories =-.

  12. Oh I think we’ve all been there. I know my daughter was so much worse at getting into things then my boys. She was into the nail polish, markers whatever looked fun to her and a mess for Mommy to clean up.
    .-= AJ @ A Little Bit Nutty´s last blog ..Blogger Bingo….Inside My Fridge =-.

  13. She’s so cute with or without looking like Desibozo!

  14. LOL. Your daughter is adorable.

  15. Yup. I can remember that one. As my Mother always said a quiet baby is usually up to no good.

    We had that experience with a PERMANANT ink Sharpie all over her and the furniture.

    Thanks for the pic. That’s funny !
    .-= Louise´s last blog ..Dinosaurs and Face Painting =-.

  16. I’m so happy you took a picture! I’ve definitely been there before :)

  17. The first thing I thought of was – how is she going to clean it off? That stuff sticks to Abby’s bottom (I too believe the creamy kind is worthless) for hours.

    ROFL!
    .-= Kim @ What’s That Smell?´s last blog ..Summertime =-.

  18. LOL! I have been there……Oh, have I been there!
    .-= Linda @ My Trendy Tykes´s last blog ..Yeah, I beat her…..you want some too? =-.

  19. Oh my, how long did take to clean her up? I can’t stop laughing, I can only imagine your face when you saw hers.
    .-= Rhonda´s last blog ..Enjoying Nature With My Grandson =-.

  20. How about leaving the tube in your son’s room when he’s supposed to be napping? Yeah. Desitin ALL over him, his clothes, the bed, the sheets, everything. I had to wash stuff with hand soap and water to get it off. He’s also done this with various other substances in his life. So glad he’s never eaten any of them.
    .-= Amanda´s last blog ..Small Talk Six – Lazy =-.

  21. LOL, cute picture. Thanks for the laugh today.
    .-= Lorri S´s last blog ..Daniel X Watch The Skies =-.

  22. Lisa Furar says:

    Sass,
    Ian & I just peed our pants laughing reading this blog. It’s been a while and I clicked on here via facebook. Brilliant BTW. But we both were on the floor reading this. Our little Leah… we have a feeling there is going to be a lifetime of these moments for, she seems like a firecracker THAT’S FOR SURE!

  23. That is hilarious! It’s amazing what they can get into in an instant! My daughter DID smear the brand new couch that I had waited 5 years to buy with A&D ointment. Guess what the stain guard company doesn’t cover…YEP…A&D ointment! Ughhh!!!
    .-= Kasey´s last blog ..Imagination Movers: For Those About To Hop Review & Giveaway =-.

  24. omg I could have wrote this post last week, My baby did the same darn thing with a brand new can of diaper cream. Now Im kicking myself in the butt for not taking a picture of her ! What a mess :)
    .-= LISA´s last blog ..Blogger Bingo E18………..Husband Blog =-.

  25. BWAHAHAA! Oh, I know that sucked to clean up!! She is precious!
    .-= Mommy Cracked´s last blog ..Blogger To WordPress To Blogger =-.

  26. AWESOME. I definitely know that smell. I would have freaked!
    .-= Elizabeth´s last blog ..I can’t even title this post =-.

  27. i have SO been there on so many occasions with other products…and captured them all on film. LOL

    trisha
    .-= trisha´s last blog ..My husband has a theory about sex =-.

  28. Cat, have you used desitin? It has a fishy smell to it. It’s au du lovely :)

  29. GROSS!!! She looks great though.

    I had no idea that Desitin had cod liver oil in it. Yuck!
    .-= Stacie Haight Connerty´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – What Papi? =-.

  30. hehehe sorry to laugh but after the day I had, that’s FUNNY. Kids are such sneaky little boogers. I haven’t got a clue what cod liver oil is or what it smells like though.
    .-= Cat @ 3 Kids and Us´s last blog ..R 22 – So Smack Me, I’m Disorganized =-.

  31. lol Funny! Reminds me of when Little Miss colored herself with BLUE nail polish! Oh and the floor, hair and clothes! Good times! Well at least you know now that that stuff really works! ;)
    .-= Stefanie´s last blog ..Bras cost how much??? =-.

  32. Lauren did this around 10 months old… She was left to her own devices, thinking, she would just sit and watch TV for 5 extra minutes while I shut my eyes. It was REALLY early in the morning, she still hadn’t quite mastered crawling yet. I remember smelling the desitin before seeing her. I saw her. It was ALL over!!! She had 2 perfectly white hand prints on a blue elephant, her soother was absolutely caked (even the little holes on the side) up her nose, in her mouth, in her hair. It was a disaster! I can totally commiserate!
    .-= Cheryl´s last blog ..Paper =-.

  33. LOL! What a great story. And she sure is one cute Desitin Clown.

    LOVE your disclosure by the way. perfect.
    .-= Marianna´s last blog ..Why 4 Boys is Better =-.

  34. Beth, yes! The bathroom is stay out zone when mommy is working…too bad she can reach and use the door handle….always keeping us on our toes, huh?

  35. Ahhh yes, the “it’s too quiet” issue. I work in the living room with my son and he will “go to the potty.” While he does in fact use the thing, it is also code for I’m going to see if things float in the bathroom . . . things like the sink . . . sigh. Thank god for excess bath towels :).
    .-= Beth´s last blog ..When Asthma Doesn’t Seem Like Asthma =-.

  36. Ok that whole thing is funny. But what I am seriously laughing about is your disclosure statement.

    LMAO I love it!
    .-= Shan @ Last Shreds Of Sanity´s last blog ..Blogger Bingo ~ R 22 =-.

  37. Leah Leah Leah, what are you doing to your mother! Too funny and so true.

    Lee :)
    .-= Lee Allport´s last blog ..My Very Own Web Show! Thursday Night @ 10:00 PM EST! =-.

  38. cute! Hannah had to run over an ask what was on the baby’s face. And I love your disclosure…too funny!!
    .-= Heather´s last blog ..PR Blackout Kickoff =-.

  39. I am sure some adventures are headed my way as I am looking for a work-at-home job now. Oh yay! LOL!

    She does look awfully cute though! :D
    .-= Chelsea´s last blog ..Blogger Bingo: Inside my Fridge and Pantry =-.

  40. So cute! I did the same thing with VIcks Vap-O-Rub when I was about that age. It took my mom days to get it out of my hair.
    .-= Lisa´s last blog ..Work at Home Sales Reps for Television Network =-.

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